The engine sounds like nothing out of the ordinary and you call that a problem and that the factory weight oil is incorrect. You sound delusional. Then you think that based on your experience hauling your groceries home every Friday, that me, already towing the same 7k# trailer over 125k miles with Hemi engines don’t know what I’m doing by following the Factory Service specs.
Like I wrote earlier, your advice is poor with nothing to back it up but your opinion of what you think you hear. You should try spending more time behind the wheel listening to the sound system instead of under the hood listening to the engine imho.
You sound upset
I tow a trailer all the time in the spring/summer/fall months. My hemi sounded normal. When you drove it it sounded just like every other hemi that I test drove, and also my brother's who happens to own a hemi, and a few friends who also own hemis. I'm very familiar with the "normal" hemi sound. When you replace that factory oil with RL, it quiets down. This is a fact, and it's not just something I noticed. Many users have reported this, and some have even video'd the evidence which is clearly noticeable.
I have hit 250 degrees while towing up a small hill in the summer. There are also way too many reports of temps getting past that on much large mountain climbs: 255, 260. If you're still using 0w-20 at those temps, well then you are nuts. No other way to put it. The hemis do not have a large enough oil cooler.
0w-20 is a fuel efficiency oil. 5w-30 is the oil you need when working it. And RL just happens to be the oil which kills the hemi tick and quiets the general valve train noise. Apparently facts are offensive these days, who knew.